Hyper-emotional. That's the word for me. Everything in excess and no self-control. I'm hyper-everything. Hyper-emotional, hyper-sensitive, hyper-scared. And it's wearing me out. I'm looking at myself through other people's eyes lately, and I understand true exhaustion. I see why people are frustrated with me, why they don't understand what's going on inside my mind. I beat everything to death. Honestly.
Chelsey, the dead horse called, and he said to stop kicking him.
I have to dissect everything over and over and over and over in my head until it drives me crazy and I can't do anything else. I replay things and stretch them out and slice them apart for motive and meaning, afraid I missed something.
It's honestly getting ridiculous. When it starts to become psychosomatic, when I feel tired all the time because I am so tired emotionally, something has got to change. And it's me that has to change it.
I just have to learn to let things go.